Sunday, July 29, 2012
Canadian Cankles
This last week we've been on our annual pilgrimage to Northern Ontario's 'Island 10 Fishing Retreat'. It's an amazing place that I've been blessed to visit for 15 years. Many of my good friends, including my brother Mike and daughter Abby, twice, have made this trip with me. Regardless, whether the fishing is slow, good or great, it's a place to recharge from our fast paced lives. I've told countless others about it, but it's one of those places you really have to visit to understand. In my estimation, there's no place like it on earth, and sharing it with those you love makes it all the better.
One, if not the only downside to this trip, is the fact that there's no chance of getting any real exercise. It also doesn't help that for every breakfast and dinner, they feed you like royalty. Not that you have to eat like royalty, but I believe they look upon it as being rude and unappreciative if you don't eat what they prepare. We're sticking to that story.
As I've gotten older, I also experience on this trip something we refer to as 'cankles'. My first memory of cankles are of my grandmother and mother talking about them. They would complain of their ankles swelling to the size of their knees, commonly caused by sitting around too much. (long car rides, couch potatoes and spending several days on a boat doing nothing but fishing) There really is no cure for cankles, with the exception of some daily activity. I can remember being quite young and asking my grandmother what's wrong with her legs? You would think that with all the grandchildren she had to keep up with, she would have no time for cankles. My mother, same thing. So I'm guessing this must be hereditary. But after this many trips, I'm still willing to suffer through a bad case of cankles for a week or so in order to spend time at one of my favorite places in the whole world.
I look forward to this week every year, like a little child does for Christmas, only worse. We start talking about it at the cigar shop in January, when the snow is still flying. Then as we get closer to the month of July, we start doing a countdown. The week leading up to the trip, I know we are a bit unbearable to our wives and close friends, but they usually humor us. Then after we return, it's a month or so of 'Island' stories and shenanigans, making memories that will last a lifetime.
This trip, compared to the other years, the fishing was about average or a little below. Taking into account the extreme dry weather and high water temps (the fish were not in their normal hideouts) and we brought along a greenhorn that hadn't been fishing since he was a young kid. The odds were stacked against us, but we caught enough fish for enjoying 2 shore lunches, donated some to the weekly Island fish fry and everyone brought some home. We also returned a lot of fish back to the lake so they could continue to grow, breed and keep Lady Evelyn Lake the great fishery it's been for many years. Ed got 'big fish' honors with boating a 27.75" walleye and Eric got schooled by a big fish. After baiting and casting out, he put his brand new pole down to remove his rain gear and a big fish removed his pole from the boat. No joy on retrieving it either. Ed and I were going to try and snag it, but then Ed got a fish on and we had take care of business first. I did have a 'first' on my 15th year of visiting Island 10. We were trolling out of an area called 'Betty's Hole' and the water depth dropped to over 60 feet. Before we entered the 'S' narrows, I got a fish on and it was a fighter. After a short battle, I had boated a 20" whitefish, my first one on the lake. It was donated to the Island fish fry where the owners put on a feast and cook all the different species in the lake. They do this to show everyone that the cold, clean water that is in the lake makes all the fish taste good, even the bottom feeders.
There were copious amounts of laughter on the deck at Cabin #4, lots of great sunsets, some incredible star gazing and another great quote coined by Ed, "If you're not drinking with us, you're drinking against us." It might have been inspired by some 12 year old Elijah Craig bourbon. Remembering that as guys, we lean towards bathroom humor at times and we couldn't help noticing the number of trips the 'honey boat' was taking to empty the pumped out waste from all the cabins. They were trying to blame me for all those trips! (even though i didn't spend near as much time in the crapper as two of our other room mates) The guys wanted to paint flames on it, add a couple of rod holders and make it my fishing boat. As funny as that would look, I'd probably still catch more fish. We did have a little five day fishing derby for the week after a day of practice for the rookie. After dominating the first three days, I slacked off and did some casting and cove fishing to let the other guys catch up. By the end of the 5th day, we were all pretty close to representing in all four categories; first keeper of the day, biggest walleye of the day, biggest smallmouth bass of the day and biggest pike of the day. Our last day on the lake was Friday and we didn't Derby fish, but if we had, my catches would have taken all 4 categories. That's just how I roll. All in all, it was a pretty good trip and some good memories were made, but Ive been home one night and I'm already thinking about next year.
Next summer we're adding a whole new twist to our trip and Barb will be coming with me for her first time, along with our good friends, Dan and Carrie Boysel. Last fall, Dan had a serious bout with cancer. I visited him at home while he was recovering from one of his surgeries. He's talked about coming up for several years with me and our friend Don Blackburn. During our visit we decided that two summers from then, that he and Carrie and Barb and I would make the journey to 'Island 10' for our anniversaries. We will be celebrating our 30th anniversaries. We figured anyone that has put up with Dan or I for that long deserves a pretty special trip. (I'm sure a cruise or week on the beach somewhere will be our next trip) But until then, I'll keep reminding the girls what a great time they will have and the memories we will make, cankles be damned!
That's the view from my stand!
"Many men go fishing all of their lives without knowing that it is not fish they are after."
Henry David Thoreau
Saturday, May 5, 2012
The Most Excellent Way!
We just spent the last 24+ hours driving 580 miles to spend an evening with my baby brother and his wife in Brown County, Indiana. His church was holding a couples retreat and they had some extra spots and I figured we could use some time away, even if it's only a day and a half. It was held at the Abe Martin Lodge at the state park. A beautiful facility and the park is huge. We talked about getting back there some time to hike the trails and maybe even stay in one of the family cabins. It is an absolutely beautiful area.
There was a speaker there from their association to talk to the couples about marriage and what Gods Word has to say about marriage. He did a great job sharing stories and relating biblical principles into our everyday lives. I grew up in the church and my parents were Godly examples to us. It is my belief that Jesus is the Son of God and that a personal relationship with Him is the only way to spend eternity in heaven. You may not have the same belief, but this is my story and by reading on it might give you something to think about. I'll be 48 yrs. old this fall and I've had some pretty awesome experiences in my life. I believe that every chapter in your life, good or bad, has formed us to be the people we are today. During my almost 48 yrs, I spent about 10 yrs. investing almost every breathing hour of the day, ministering to youth and their families. I was ordained into ministry and served as our churches Student Minister/Assoc. Pastor. I may not have been the best or even a very good student minister, but I loved almost every minute of it, and some of the best relationships that we still have today are with some of the families we served. I say "We" because doing ministry is a family commitment. Don't ever doubt that for a minute. Like I said before, I grew up in the church, and I've read the Bible forwards, backwards, in chronological order, Bible in a year plan, The novel, and numerous other reading plans as well as several different translations. I also studied at Johnson Bible College. I've been privileged to speak at funerals and perform wedding ceremonies for some special people. I tell you all of this to get to the story from this weekend.
Most people know when you're talking about the Bible and you say, 'the love chapter' you are referring to First Corinthians 13. It's been read at just about every wedding ceremony I've attended. If you're not familiar with it, basically it describes what true love is. The heart of the reading goes something like this; "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy or boast, it's not proud. It doesn't dishonor others, it's not self-seeking, it's not easily angered, and it keeps no record of wrongs. Love doesn't delight in evil but celebrates in truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails." It spends some time telling you what happens if love isn't at the center of our actions and words. Talk about a convicting chapter. Every time I read it I'm reminded of all the times I've messed up or disappointed others or myself. And then to wrap up the chapter it ends with a reminder, "These three things remain; faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love." Imagine the impact on our world today if everyone embraced and acted just on the instruction of this one short chapter. That's a whole other blog post on its own for another time.
Anyway, Friday night the speaker was using First Corinthians 13 as the building block for the weekend. As he began he said, "let me show you something that so many of us miss." And in my mind I'm going over the chapter in my head and thinking to myself, what could we have possibly missed all the times I've read, heard, helped students memorize this chapter? Was I ever wrong...again! He asks, "does anyone know the last verse of chapter 12 before you get to 13?" I didn't, but here are a few of the translations; Good News Translation of 12:31- "Set your hearts, then, on the more important gifts. Best of all, however, is the following way." The Message Translation of 12:31- "But now I want to lay out a far better way for you." King James Version of 12:31- "But covet earnestly the best gifts, and yet shew I unto you a more excellent way." And my personal favorite translation of this verse, the NIV translation of 12:31- "Now eagerly desire the greater gifts. And yet I will show you the most excellent way." What? The writer, the Apostle Paul, who called himself the worst of sinners, said in his best 'Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventures' voice, "Chase after the good in life, and here is the most excellent way!" He didn't say here's a good idea. He didn't say if nothing else works try this. He didn't say this may or may not work. He said, "Here is the most EXCELLENT way."
I'm sitting there thinking to myself, how did I miss that all these years? That verse can preach, and it did! Chapter 13 is not just about what love is, but it starts off by telling us that if we speak with human eloquence but don't love, our words are nothing more than clanging cymbal, a resounding gong, or a creaking rusty gate; empty words. 12:31 sets the standard for our relationships, especially with our spouses, but also with our children, family members, and others.
I've made my share of mistakes in relationships and will probably make a few more in my lifetime. But I have an understanding of the words grace and mercy. Without a belief in God, grace, mercy and forgiveness are words without meaning. As crazy as things have gotten in our society in my 47+ years, I believe that a life without a personal relationship with Jesus is reckless. And I also believe that relationship is indeed, personal. We're all different, and have different needs and ideas about how relationships work. But don't forget, the 'MOST EXCELLENT'way is to be sure that love is in the center of all that you do. Earlier I shared the last couple of verses of Chapter 13 from the NIV translation. I want to share them again from a different translation called The Message. It was written by a theologian and professor, Eugene Peterson. I like this translation because of his choice of words and the ability he has to make the text relate to anyone, regardless of where you are in life's journey. Here's verse 13:"But for right now, until that completeness, we have three things to do to lead us toward that consummation. Trust steadily in God, hope unswervingly, love extravagantly. And the best of the three is love." See what I mean?
The weekend isn't over, but I'm sure glad we drove that 580 miles and got to see Jim & Melissa, some beautiful country scenery, and be reminded of 'The Most Excellent Way'. That's the view from my stand!
PS: This is the first time I've tried posting fom the IPad so please forgive the grammar mistakes until I get this thing figured out. Thanks!
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
Cha Cha Cha Changes!
You know, I thought that I would be posting to my blog a lot more the last few weeks but as you can see, I have not. On Feb. 28th I went in for a total knee replacement on my left knee. I’m not saying it’s that big of a deal, lots of people have had knee replacements. And many people we know are struggling with much more serious issues, cancer, MS, alcoholism, broken families, etc. I suppose I decided in my mind, that I wasn’t going to do a “day-by-day” journal of my rehab. Today is exactly 6 weeks since surgery. I feel like I’ve being doing pretty good with my PT appointments, exercising at home, and working out at the YMCA. Unfortunately, I don’t think my knee is where I hoped it would be at 6 weeks out. People, who know me well, know that I don’t like sitting around or ‘taking it easy’. My job, which I love, requires me to be very active and working in the outdoors. When the Doc said, “your recovery time will be somewhere in the 6-8 week time frame”, I hear, “you should be back to work in 6 weeks.” Maybe my expectations were not realistic, but right now I still walk with a pretty significant limp. When I have to walk long distances or be on my feet for a long period of time, I feel like the use of my walking cane is necessary. My next appointment with my surgeon is tomorrow, so I’ll get a better idea of what he’s thinking about my rehab and return to work. I’ll keep you posted. I’ve thanked them many times, but I want to say again, “A huge THANKS to Barb, Abby, Mariah and DJ, for all the extra assistance; water refills, bringing extra pillows, running to the store for scripts, holding doors, massaging leg & foot, and all those other little things that mattered way more than you’ll ever know. I love and appreciate you all!”
Since my last post, we’ve had some pretty good times and some changes in our lives. The kids were on Spring Break last week and we wanted to do something besides hang around the house. Barb’s work has been crazy and she couldn’t get any time off, so she couldn’t join us on our road trip to Illinois Lake of the Woods , in Mahomet. There they climbed the bell tower and played and climbed on everything at the playground. I told them about all the times we climbed the tower and sled down the hills around the tower. They thought that was pretty cool. I think their favorite part was going to the Mansfield General Store. It all started last Sunday night when Deej and I were watching the 1971 version of “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.” DJ asked if there really were candy stores like the one at the beginning of the movie, when we were kids. So I told him about our little towns General Store and Friday afternoon I took them and their cousins to see the old time candy store. Of course the store was more than just candy, but they had all the old stuff that we used to get when we were kids. Stuff like Dots, Oh Henry bar, candy cigarettes and cigar gum, Sixlets, Lemonheads, Boston Baked Beans, you get the idea. They thought that was all really neat, but when they saw that they also offered ice cream, the ice cream won them over.
While we were back, I also got the chance to sit down with a couple of long time friends who also have/had teenage children and we spent a lot of time talking about how we parent and how our teenage children know way more than we do. Yes, of course I’m being a bit sarcastic, but I guess it’s pretty much been like that since the beginning of time. We came to the conclusion, that after they get to a certain age they are going to do whatever they want, parents be damned. We just hope that some of the things that we have taught them in 18 years stick, and they make some good decisions with their future in mind. While we were in Illinois
The hard lesson for me is realizing that it’s great to have expectations for your children, and you hope they make good decisions for themselves and their future. But inevitably, they are going to carve their own path through the wilderness. And we’ll continue to hold onto the hope that something you said or did will resonate in their mind and they will remember all the blood, sweat and tears you put into their lives, loving them only like a parent can. Changes….you gotta love them. That’s the view from my stand!
Sunday, January 22, 2012
Who do you know?
When we were kids, when it came to having money we had no idea of the concept of being 'rich' or 'poor'. Mainly because it didn't matter, we had what we needed. Growing up, the world tells us, "You have to climb that corporate ladder, how much you make defines you, make and take whatever you can." As an adult we begin to realize the importance of putting things in order by their priority in our lives. This morning as I was reading an article about a high profile professional athlete doing some pretty amazing things off the field, a couple of thoughts came to mind. My first thought was, "Who do I know personally that exhibits that kind of selflessness?" I have the pleasure of knowing a lot of great people from many different cultures and walks of life. Many of them would be great examples of selflessness, but this question sparked a very pleasant memory from our childhood.
When we were young we lived across the street from the city park. Now when I say 'city', it's a little misleading because technically our home town was a village. A village with around 450 residents. It is a quiet, very nostalgic place in the middle of farm country. When you could walk from one end of town to the other in 10 minutes, pretty much everyone was your 'neighbor'. The park was a place where everyone gathered after school and all day long in the summer months. Sometimes in the evening or near dark, kids would have to be dragged home because they didn't want to leave. One of my favorite things at the park was when we had pick up baseball games. Usually the oldest two kids would be 'captains' and they would take turns choosing until everyone was on a team. Some of the kids were real characters and many I am still friends with today. You could almost always count on kids from these families being at the park; Dodge's, Alexander's, Ipox's, Crawford's, Watts, Moxley's, Conroy's, Hammer's, Beard's, Kirby's, and others. {No families were left off this list intentionally, these are the ones that come to my mind first.} We would play baseball until it was to dark to see the ball coming off the bat. The way the field was set up, when you hit one 'out of the park', it usually meant it landed in our back yard or possibly hit our house. Our screened in back porch faced the park. Coincidentally, the first one I recall hitting the house was hit by "Arkie" Ipox. I'm sure some older kids probably did it too, but I remember always wanting to be on "Arkie's" team when teams were picked.
One afternoon we were playing and it was getting pretty late in the day. My mom came off our back porch and over to the park with a giant plate of sandwiches and orange koolaid for EVERYONE! This was something she did often, for different occasions, but it was a pretty big deal to us kids. We all sat around on the ground and enjoyed our feast after a hard day of playing. I know, that doesn't seem like a very big deal when you think about it, just sandwiches and flavored water, right? But, as some of you know, my Mom and Dad we're parents to 10 kids. They had their own baseball team! My parents both worked outside the home at different times in their lives, Dad usually had at least 2 jobs it seemed. But they were never very 'wealthy', monetarily. So, as I look back now, making sandwiches and koolaid for two baseball teams really was a pretty big deal. And it was just one of the many examples of selflessness I've seen modeled by our Mom. She has always been involved one way or another helping others. She's watched over countless neighborhood kids, volunteered many hours at the hospital, making meals and taking them to those that were sick, homebound or lost a loved one, cooking, singing, telling stories and entertaining all the Senior Saints that show up at the Senior Center. And all of this while raising and continuing to care for 10 children, 30+ grandchildren, and 20ish great grandchildren.
Yeah, I'm pretty proud of my Mom, but most impotantly, she taught us this: "Life isn't about what you can get or gather up for yourself. It's the culmination of the love of God and how much of yourself you are willing to give to others. Because that is really when you experience true joy here on earth!" I hope that one day when I'm long gone, that my kids or grandkids will be able to say similar things about me as I have said about our mother.
That's the view from my stand. Thanks for reading!
When we were young we lived across the street from the city park. Now when I say 'city', it's a little misleading because technically our home town was a village. A village with around 450 residents. It is a quiet, very nostalgic place in the middle of farm country. When you could walk from one end of town to the other in 10 minutes, pretty much everyone was your 'neighbor'. The park was a place where everyone gathered after school and all day long in the summer months. Sometimes in the evening or near dark, kids would have to be dragged home because they didn't want to leave. One of my favorite things at the park was when we had pick up baseball games. Usually the oldest two kids would be 'captains' and they would take turns choosing until everyone was on a team. Some of the kids were real characters and many I am still friends with today. You could almost always count on kids from these families being at the park; Dodge's, Alexander's, Ipox's, Crawford's, Watts, Moxley's, Conroy's, Hammer's, Beard's, Kirby's, and others. {No families were left off this list intentionally, these are the ones that come to my mind first.} We would play baseball until it was to dark to see the ball coming off the bat. The way the field was set up, when you hit one 'out of the park', it usually meant it landed in our back yard or possibly hit our house. Our screened in back porch faced the park. Coincidentally, the first one I recall hitting the house was hit by "Arkie" Ipox. I'm sure some older kids probably did it too, but I remember always wanting to be on "Arkie's" team when teams were picked.
One afternoon we were playing and it was getting pretty late in the day. My mom came off our back porch and over to the park with a giant plate of sandwiches and orange koolaid for EVERYONE! This was something she did often, for different occasions, but it was a pretty big deal to us kids. We all sat around on the ground and enjoyed our feast after a hard day of playing. I know, that doesn't seem like a very big deal when you think about it, just sandwiches and flavored water, right? But, as some of you know, my Mom and Dad we're parents to 10 kids. They had their own baseball team! My parents both worked outside the home at different times in their lives, Dad usually had at least 2 jobs it seemed. But they were never very 'wealthy', monetarily. So, as I look back now, making sandwiches and koolaid for two baseball teams really was a pretty big deal. And it was just one of the many examples of selflessness I've seen modeled by our Mom. She has always been involved one way or another helping others. She's watched over countless neighborhood kids, volunteered many hours at the hospital, making meals and taking them to those that were sick, homebound or lost a loved one, cooking, singing, telling stories and entertaining all the Senior Saints that show up at the Senior Center. And all of this while raising and continuing to care for 10 children, 30+ grandchildren, and 20ish great grandchildren.
Yeah, I'm pretty proud of my Mom, but most impotantly, she taught us this: "Life isn't about what you can get or gather up for yourself. It's the culmination of the love of God and how much of yourself you are willing to give to others. Because that is really when you experience true joy here on earth!" I hope that one day when I'm long gone, that my kids or grandkids will be able to say similar things about me as I have said about our mother.
That's the view from my stand. Thanks for reading!
Sunday, January 15, 2012
Dream On...
Do you have dreams? If you do, do you remember them in vivid Technicolor? My buddy, Ed, is one of those guys who does. He has such elaborate dreams with elements that usually don't belong together, it's always entertaining to hear his rendition of such dreams. He's a great story teller too. Occasionally, I have dreams and actually remember them. Most of the time they are just flashes, like watching a highlight reel after a big game.
Last night was different. I don't know if it was the leftovers from Red Lobster that I ate at 11pm or just the fact that I was really tired, but one dream I had last night was very clear. My dream was from a memory from a long time ago. When we were very young Dad would take us to Niddles Creek, {sp?} out near the county line. We would fish for catfish and bluegill. My dream was me, as a very young guy, somewhere around 6-8 years of age. We were sitting in our old folding chairs, you know, those ones with the nylon type straps that leave waffle marks on your backside if you sit in them too long. We were bobber fishing and being a little bored as kids get, I started fooling around in my chair. Dad had left us for a few minutes to retrieve something from his vehicle. I started to stand up in the chair to see where he was and one of my legs slipped between the "waffle butt" straps of the chair. As I went through the chair, the metal frame became unbalanced and started to tip over. I panicked and tried to regain balance by hopping on the one leg that went through the chair. My hopping caused the chair to begin folding up and pinched my leg in the metal frame. Down I went in a heap of flailing arms and leg, caught in the ninja death grip of a K-Mart 'waffle butt' folding chair. To a young child this is definitely a serious and traumatic situation. I was screaming in pain, somewhat embarrassed, and wondering why no one was trying to help me. Out of the corner of my eye I see Dad running towards us with a traumatic look on his face, as if someone was letting out a death scream. That might have been me. When he got to my side he quickly assessed the situation, unfolded the chair and removed my leg from the waffle straps. Dad snatched me from what in my young mind seemed like certain death, and picked me up in his arms. After checking the marks on my leg from the chair frame and making sure I was okay, he wanted to know what happened. My siblings were quick to fill Dad in and let him know that I was standing up in the folding chair. I told him that I was looking for him but couldn't see him so I stood up. Next I was scolded for standing up in the unstable 'waffle butt' chair and I swore I would never do it again. Dad put me down and I went over to an empty 5 gallon bucket and turned it over to sit on that to fish. That's where my dream ended, or what I can remember of it.
The dream was crystal clear and so vivid as if this happened yesterday and not 40 years ago. Then I began to think, 'Why in the world would I have a dream like that in the first place?' My only reasoning for such a dream is that maybe I needed this reminder. My Dad wasn't a perfect Dad, but he showed a pretty great balance of compassion, discipline, silliness, common sense, and love of family and his life. Some people on the outside looking in might say that he was 'tough' on us boys. I'm sure I might have thought so when I was a kid, but as an adult, I'm incredibly thankful for my Dad. He taught me what a good work ethic is; he taught us there's a right and wrong to everything and you stay out of trouble more often if you're in the right; he taught us the importance of doing for others, especially those less fortunate than yourself; but I believe, most importantly, he modeled for us boys how to be a good husband and dad.
In many situations with our own kids I find myself asking this question, "What would Dad do?" Yes, we're dealing with a very different generation of kids from when we were growing up, but I believe if we stay true to some of the "old school' ways, more of the kids today would be more respectful of adults and those in authority. But that's a whole different blog post in itself. Dad's been gone for a long time, but to see him so vividly in a dream was pretty cool. Remembering him when he was in his prime; strong, handsome, smiling, was certainly better than remembering him in his last few months on earth. Thanks for the dream last night Dad. I hope some day that we get to sit together and you tell me that 'I made you proud as a husband and dad.' But until then, I'll just see you in my dreams.
I can't finish the story there because my fishing pals are going to want to know this. Ed, Bobby, Ralph, Ted, Jason...when we went fishing with Dad, we almost always brought back a 5 gallon bucket with fish in it, and that's no dream!
Thanks for reading, and that's the view from my stand!
Last night was different. I don't know if it was the leftovers from Red Lobster that I ate at 11pm or just the fact that I was really tired, but one dream I had last night was very clear. My dream was from a memory from a long time ago. When we were very young Dad would take us to Niddles Creek, {sp?} out near the county line. We would fish for catfish and bluegill. My dream was me, as a very young guy, somewhere around 6-8 years of age. We were sitting in our old folding chairs, you know, those ones with the nylon type straps that leave waffle marks on your backside if you sit in them too long. We were bobber fishing and being a little bored as kids get, I started fooling around in my chair. Dad had left us for a few minutes to retrieve something from his vehicle. I started to stand up in the chair to see where he was and one of my legs slipped between the "waffle butt" straps of the chair. As I went through the chair, the metal frame became unbalanced and started to tip over. I panicked and tried to regain balance by hopping on the one leg that went through the chair. My hopping caused the chair to begin folding up and pinched my leg in the metal frame. Down I went in a heap of flailing arms and leg, caught in the ninja death grip of a K-Mart 'waffle butt' folding chair. To a young child this is definitely a serious and traumatic situation. I was screaming in pain, somewhat embarrassed, and wondering why no one was trying to help me. Out of the corner of my eye I see Dad running towards us with a traumatic look on his face, as if someone was letting out a death scream. That might have been me. When he got to my side he quickly assessed the situation, unfolded the chair and removed my leg from the waffle straps. Dad snatched me from what in my young mind seemed like certain death, and picked me up in his arms. After checking the marks on my leg from the chair frame and making sure I was okay, he wanted to know what happened. My siblings were quick to fill Dad in and let him know that I was standing up in the folding chair. I told him that I was looking for him but couldn't see him so I stood up. Next I was scolded for standing up in the unstable 'waffle butt' chair and I swore I would never do it again. Dad put me down and I went over to an empty 5 gallon bucket and turned it over to sit on that to fish. That's where my dream ended, or what I can remember of it.
The dream was crystal clear and so vivid as if this happened yesterday and not 40 years ago. Then I began to think, 'Why in the world would I have a dream like that in the first place?' My only reasoning for such a dream is that maybe I needed this reminder. My Dad wasn't a perfect Dad, but he showed a pretty great balance of compassion, discipline, silliness, common sense, and love of family and his life. Some people on the outside looking in might say that he was 'tough' on us boys. I'm sure I might have thought so when I was a kid, but as an adult, I'm incredibly thankful for my Dad. He taught me what a good work ethic is; he taught us there's a right and wrong to everything and you stay out of trouble more often if you're in the right; he taught us the importance of doing for others, especially those less fortunate than yourself; but I believe, most importantly, he modeled for us boys how to be a good husband and dad.
In many situations with our own kids I find myself asking this question, "What would Dad do?" Yes, we're dealing with a very different generation of kids from when we were growing up, but I believe if we stay true to some of the "old school' ways, more of the kids today would be more respectful of adults and those in authority. But that's a whole different blog post in itself. Dad's been gone for a long time, but to see him so vividly in a dream was pretty cool. Remembering him when he was in his prime; strong, handsome, smiling, was certainly better than remembering him in his last few months on earth. Thanks for the dream last night Dad. I hope some day that we get to sit together and you tell me that 'I made you proud as a husband and dad.' But until then, I'll just see you in my dreams.
I can't finish the story there because my fishing pals are going to want to know this. Ed, Bobby, Ralph, Ted, Jason...when we went fishing with Dad, we almost always brought back a 5 gallon bucket with fish in it, and that's no dream!
Thanks for reading, and that's the view from my stand!
Sunday, January 1, 2012
2012... Let's See What Ya Got!
Good New Years morning! Wow, did 2011 blow by or what? It was a year of indifference for us in many ways. I'm glad it's over and we look forward to 2012 being a much better year. We had invitations to several parties to celebrate NYE, but decided to take Mariah and DJ to an early dinner at Amato's with our friends, Larry and Marci and their son, Hunter. Then a night of movies for the guys on the new Blue Ray player {LOTR and Rambo} while the girls danced and played games on the Kinnect. Barb made some delicious snacks and at 11:30ish, we gathered in the living room to watch the "Ball Drop" in NYC. I was greatly disappointed in the 'talent' they had to bring the New Year in. I think it might be a better idea in the future if they are going to use John Lennon's "Imagine" song again, they just play a recording of it. I haven't seen very many artists that are able to do that song and do it well. Shortly after the stroke of midnight we all headed for bed. I know, so much excitement in one night, how do I contain myself? I enjoyed reading all the NYE posts on Facebook, seeing how our family and friends were bringing in the New Year before I went to sleep. Yep, that was it.
I've never been one to come up with New Years resolutions every year. I'm always hopeful that I'll be a better person this year than last. Some years I actually think I've succeeded. I think it's a good and an obtainable goal for all of us. Right? But one of the things that I want to do differently for 2012 is to write in this blog more often. I've been blogging since 2009 and the pattern I see is each year I've had fewer blog entries. Not that our lives are all that exciting and people are calling me to remind me to blog, but I have just neglected to take the time to do it. I've always found writing to be very therapeutic and something that I enjoy doing. Many times some of our most raw and vulnerable thoughts and feelings come out when we put them down on paper. {or in a blog} Usually it's the things that matter most to us, family, friends and faith.
So, with that being said, I hope to kick it up a notch with the blog posts and if you enjoy reading them please feel free to leave a note or comment on any of them. Thanks for all the encouragement and I hope 2012 brings you everything that you wish. Happy New Year! That's the view from my stand!
I've never been one to come up with New Years resolutions every year. I'm always hopeful that I'll be a better person this year than last. Some years I actually think I've succeeded. I think it's a good and an obtainable goal for all of us. Right? But one of the things that I want to do differently for 2012 is to write in this blog more often. I've been blogging since 2009 and the pattern I see is each year I've had fewer blog entries. Not that our lives are all that exciting and people are calling me to remind me to blog, but I have just neglected to take the time to do it. I've always found writing to be very therapeutic and something that I enjoy doing. Many times some of our most raw and vulnerable thoughts and feelings come out when we put them down on paper. {or in a blog} Usually it's the things that matter most to us, family, friends and faith.
So, with that being said, I hope to kick it up a notch with the blog posts and if you enjoy reading them please feel free to leave a note or comment on any of them. Thanks for all the encouragement and I hope 2012 brings you everything that you wish. Happy New Year! That's the view from my stand!
Saturday, December 24, 2011
Crashing Into Christmas
I know, I know, I have neglected the blog writing again and for that I apologize. I couldn't believe it when I clicked on the site and it said my last post was October. Like many of you experience, it seems our life continues to get busier and more complex the older we get. I guess we're pretty lucky to get several days off in a row here at Christmas for some much needed down time. I'll take it and I thought I would also take this opportunity to catch up here. In years past I have always been pretty good about getting greeting cards out to family and friends at Christmas. They would always, well almost always, have our family Christmas letter in them. Several years ago I didn't get the letter in our cards and boy did I hear about it. {I wont mention any names here, but we're all still friends}
As most of you know, we lost our older brother Mike unexpectedly a couple years ago in November. Those first couple of Christmases were pretty rough. In fact, they sucked. We didn't decorate our home inside or out and I didn't really feel much like sending out cards or a letter. This season I thought I would get "ahead of the game" and the weekend after Thanksgiving I began decorating outside the house. Barb got some of her collection of Nativity scenes out and her and the kids put the tree up and decorated it. The house looks somewhat festive, inside and out. But alas, I failed at getting cards and letters out this year. Baby steps, right? So I decided to do a first and use my blog as the avenue of delivery. Some may not get this but many of you will and this year it will have to do.
Overall, we've had a pretty good 2011. When you're a parent of three or however many, your life is pretty much set on their schedules so we've kind of rolled with it. We do try to get a night out from time to time for adult time, usually with a lot less noise than what's at home. I thought in this letter I would try not to bore you with a month to month run down of our activities. {Yes, we have lots of room for activities} Instead, I thought I would share a few "firsts" with you. First, let's start with DJ.
DJ turned 11 last month. He's still a big "gamer" on the video games but this year he decided to play tackle football for the first time for an Optimist Club team. He was put on the "Barons" team which had 24 kids, half of them playing for the first time. He hated conditioning and wanted to quit, but when game time came around he started to really have a good time. I'll never forget one practice where the coach had given the boys a water break and these coaches worked the boys pretty hard. As the boys were returning to the huddle the coach says, "DJ, why are you always one of the last guys hustling back from a water break?" Without missing a beat DJ says, "I'm saving myself for the game, Coach!" That immediately reminded me of Bill Murray in "Stripes" and I was sliding down in the seat of my truck trying to stifle my laugh. He was one of the smaller guys on the team of 11-13 yr. olds, but was playing offense and defensive line and doing a pretty good job playing with a lot of heart. Their team finished the season undefeated and each player was awarded a trophy and given a t-shirt that said "League Champions" on it. The Monday after the awards banquet I asked Deej if he was going to wear his new shirt to school and his answer surprised me. He said, "Wearing that shirt is bragging and it makes all my friends mad. {He was on a team with no kids from his school} So I'll just wear it on the weekends." He didn't care so much about the wins, he just loved to play. And furthermore, he was sincere and humble, giving us a look at his growing, 11 year old, kind heart. That made us more proud than all the wins too!
Mariah is going to be 13 in February, although, she seems to think she's 16. She has a flare for the drama all day, every day. She's not happy unless she's yelling at her younger brother for something as simple as breathing to loud. Ahh..teenage girls. This year Mariah was very excited to get a part in the middle school musical, "Annie Jr." Man, did those kids put on a great presentation for 7th and 8th graders. Mariah was one of the "bratty orphans" so she really didn't have to get much out of character. She has a beautiful voice and did an outstanding job and surprised us with a cartwheel to our corner of the stage the night we had front row seats. She loves to sing, dance and act, in fact, she has a part in the school play coming in February. Earlier this year Barb took Mariah to the American Idol Tour Show that featured the top 12 Idol contestants. Prior to the concert, they had a karaoke stage outside the venue and Mariah got on stage and rocked the audience of a couple thousand people with the "Grenade" song. She received a tour poster signed by the 12 Idol contestants. We tell her that Uncle Eddie and I are going to sign her to the "Smoking Dog Records" label and make her a star. In our eyes, she already is!
Abby will be 19 in January. She started her first year of college and that was a big change not having her around the house. Not that she spent all that much time at home anyway, but we knew we weren't going to see her much when she went to school. One of the things we really missed was having that extra driver to help get the kids to where they needed to be. I've taken up about 90% of those duties. {Another reason I havent had much time to write on the blog} When she gets her year of general studies out of the way, she plans on studying International Business with a secondary in the Chinese Language. When she was in HS she went on a 20 day student leadership trip to China just before the Olympics. She really enjoyed the culture and history of that country. Abby did her first semester at Bowling Green and decided BG was not for her. So she returned home and will finish the year at Columbus State. This allows her to return to her job she had all last summer and attend a school only 25 minutes from home. We say we're "undecided" on whether we like her being back home. Her siblings don't seem to be wild about it, but the truth is, her Mom is glad she's back. {Insert evil smile here}
Barb and I have kept pretty busy with our jobs with some of the extra duties that we've been assigned. IGS is getting into the electric business to go with their natural gas business so things are pretty crazy but busy for her. We've had a few changes at Alpha the last few months that has required me to take on a lot more responsibility but nothing I cant handle. Last month Barb celebrated her 1 year anniversary of her knee replacement surgery with a 100% recovery. She's not tap dancing like Mom Paxton, but she's very pleased with the results. After the first of the year I will be having the same surgery on my left knee and I'm hoping for similar results. Because Barb had to be off work for an extended time for her recovery we really didn't get a family vacation this past summer. So, we're really looking forward to going somewhere special this next summer with the kids. {They remind us regularly that they were "jipped" out of a vaction} They have such a rough life.
We continue to be amazed at all the blessings in our lives. We have great family, awesome friends, we both get to work with some pretty incredibly good people, and we thank God for all those things. With the struggling economy and unemployment, marital and relationship problems that so many people we know are dealing with, I think it's important to share this thought I had about 2:30 this morning with you, especially this time of the year: This Christmas do something different. Go to the room your tree is in and turn off all the lights except the ones on the tree. As you sit quietly, remember that the blessings in your life way outnumber the bulbs on the tree. See how bright that tree is? Yeah, that's what others see in you. The message of Christmas: "No matter how tough the journey gets, you're never alone."
Merry Christmas and the best and brightest New Year to each of you. That's the view from my stand!
As most of you know, we lost our older brother Mike unexpectedly a couple years ago in November. Those first couple of Christmases were pretty rough. In fact, they sucked. We didn't decorate our home inside or out and I didn't really feel much like sending out cards or a letter. This season I thought I would get "ahead of the game" and the weekend after Thanksgiving I began decorating outside the house. Barb got some of her collection of Nativity scenes out and her and the kids put the tree up and decorated it. The house looks somewhat festive, inside and out. But alas, I failed at getting cards and letters out this year. Baby steps, right? So I decided to do a first and use my blog as the avenue of delivery. Some may not get this but many of you will and this year it will have to do.
Overall, we've had a pretty good 2011. When you're a parent of three or however many, your life is pretty much set on their schedules so we've kind of rolled with it. We do try to get a night out from time to time for adult time, usually with a lot less noise than what's at home. I thought in this letter I would try not to bore you with a month to month run down of our activities. {Yes, we have lots of room for activities} Instead, I thought I would share a few "firsts" with you. First, let's start with DJ.
DJ turned 11 last month. He's still a big "gamer" on the video games but this year he decided to play tackle football for the first time for an Optimist Club team. He was put on the "Barons" team which had 24 kids, half of them playing for the first time. He hated conditioning and wanted to quit, but when game time came around he started to really have a good time. I'll never forget one practice where the coach had given the boys a water break and these coaches worked the boys pretty hard. As the boys were returning to the huddle the coach says, "DJ, why are you always one of the last guys hustling back from a water break?" Without missing a beat DJ says, "I'm saving myself for the game, Coach!" That immediately reminded me of Bill Murray in "Stripes" and I was sliding down in the seat of my truck trying to stifle my laugh. He was one of the smaller guys on the team of 11-13 yr. olds, but was playing offense and defensive line and doing a pretty good job playing with a lot of heart. Their team finished the season undefeated and each player was awarded a trophy and given a t-shirt that said "League Champions" on it. The Monday after the awards banquet I asked Deej if he was going to wear his new shirt to school and his answer surprised me. He said, "Wearing that shirt is bragging and it makes all my friends mad. {He was on a team with no kids from his school} So I'll just wear it on the weekends." He didn't care so much about the wins, he just loved to play. And furthermore, he was sincere and humble, giving us a look at his growing, 11 year old, kind heart. That made us more proud than all the wins too!
Mariah is going to be 13 in February, although, she seems to think she's 16. She has a flare for the drama all day, every day. She's not happy unless she's yelling at her younger brother for something as simple as breathing to loud. Ahh..teenage girls. This year Mariah was very excited to get a part in the middle school musical, "Annie Jr." Man, did those kids put on a great presentation for 7th and 8th graders. Mariah was one of the "bratty orphans" so she really didn't have to get much out of character. She has a beautiful voice and did an outstanding job and surprised us with a cartwheel to our corner of the stage the night we had front row seats. She loves to sing, dance and act, in fact, she has a part in the school play coming in February. Earlier this year Barb took Mariah to the American Idol Tour Show that featured the top 12 Idol contestants. Prior to the concert, they had a karaoke stage outside the venue and Mariah got on stage and rocked the audience of a couple thousand people with the "Grenade" song. She received a tour poster signed by the 12 Idol contestants. We tell her that Uncle Eddie and I are going to sign her to the "Smoking Dog Records" label and make her a star. In our eyes, she already is!
Abby will be 19 in January. She started her first year of college and that was a big change not having her around the house. Not that she spent all that much time at home anyway, but we knew we weren't going to see her much when she went to school. One of the things we really missed was having that extra driver to help get the kids to where they needed to be. I've taken up about 90% of those duties. {Another reason I havent had much time to write on the blog} When she gets her year of general studies out of the way, she plans on studying International Business with a secondary in the Chinese Language. When she was in HS she went on a 20 day student leadership trip to China just before the Olympics. She really enjoyed the culture and history of that country. Abby did her first semester at Bowling Green and decided BG was not for her. So she returned home and will finish the year at Columbus State. This allows her to return to her job she had all last summer and attend a school only 25 minutes from home. We say we're "undecided" on whether we like her being back home. Her siblings don't seem to be wild about it, but the truth is, her Mom is glad she's back. {Insert evil smile here}
Barb and I have kept pretty busy with our jobs with some of the extra duties that we've been assigned. IGS is getting into the electric business to go with their natural gas business so things are pretty crazy but busy for her. We've had a few changes at Alpha the last few months that has required me to take on a lot more responsibility but nothing I cant handle. Last month Barb celebrated her 1 year anniversary of her knee replacement surgery with a 100% recovery. She's not tap dancing like Mom Paxton, but she's very pleased with the results. After the first of the year I will be having the same surgery on my left knee and I'm hoping for similar results. Because Barb had to be off work for an extended time for her recovery we really didn't get a family vacation this past summer. So, we're really looking forward to going somewhere special this next summer with the kids. {They remind us regularly that they were "jipped" out of a vaction} They have such a rough life.
We continue to be amazed at all the blessings in our lives. We have great family, awesome friends, we both get to work with some pretty incredibly good people, and we thank God for all those things. With the struggling economy and unemployment, marital and relationship problems that so many people we know are dealing with, I think it's important to share this thought I had about 2:30 this morning with you, especially this time of the year: This Christmas do something different. Go to the room your tree is in and turn off all the lights except the ones on the tree. As you sit quietly, remember that the blessings in your life way outnumber the bulbs on the tree. See how bright that tree is? Yeah, that's what others see in you. The message of Christmas: "No matter how tough the journey gets, you're never alone."
Merry Christmas and the best and brightest New Year to each of you. That's the view from my stand!
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