Sometimes We Need A Reminder...

It seems that things have been flying at warp speed the first couple months of 2011. Everyone has had to deal with some crazy weather, power outings, and all the things that come with winter. Winter also seems to bring about the extreme cold and gives us plenty of time to do some contemplating by the warm fireplace.
One of the things that have been in our conversations and thoughts is this; as we get older we are greeted with the realization that we are not immortal. In fact, I remind Barb on occasion that “the mortality rate is still hovering around the 100% mark these days.” When we look around and see our friends {and spouse} having knee or hip replacement surgeries, wearing triple bifocals, spending more time at the pharmacy than the gym; it really hits home. One of the things that really gets to me are the diseases that are out there that renders the individual with the disease practically helpless.
A good friend of ours has been suffering with MS. She was diagnosed more than 10 years ago. In fact, there are a number of people in our life that have been impacted by this debilitating disease. For this reason, I’ve learned a lot about MS the last few years. I’m certainly not an expert but I can tell you from first hand experience, it’s very difficult to see a loved one have their spirit weakened and their mind diminished by MS. When this disease attacks the nervous system and challenges the normal thought processes, it totally changes the person; their character, demeanor, sense of humor, and more. I know that every case of MS is different and I’m just speaking from my own experiences. But when the disease settles in, the person with that disease is just not the same anymore. Our friend was one of those bubbly people that you loved to be around. She had that “sparkle” in her eyes of fun and mischief, she was always dressed in elegant clothing, she was a successful business woman, she loved to travel, she loved her “Cubbies” and she loved her husband, her son, and her family and friends. Today, she’s just a shell of the person she was and that’s the tough thing to accept. It’s absolutely the toughest on her husband who has been caring for her through all these changes.
In most cases of MS, it’s happening to much older adults so moving your 50 yr. old spouse into a nursing home is a big deal. When you think about it, who really plans for long term hospitalization or disability when you’re in your 30’s? We sure didn’t. So, not only is this a very traumatic time because of the life changes but it can also be very stressful financially. I told my friend, the husband, that I couldn’t begin to imagine walking in his shoes even for a day. Absolutely no one wishes to have to deal with the nasty things that MS does to a persons mind and character; but my friend has dealt with it pretty well for the last 10+ years.
As many of us find out with the presence of life-threatening illnesses or/and the sudden loss of someone important to you, life can get very difficult. The things that have become routine, no longer are. The things that bring you much pleasure or even simple enjoyment are put on an infinite “hold pattern”, much like planes trying to land at the airport. You feel the pressures of all these things coming to the top and you think you might need to wrap Ductape around your head to keep it from exploding. Feelings of loneliness, hopelessness and helplessness invade parts of our mind where it never resided before. These are the times in life where we need to remember this truth: Life was never intended to be done alone. This may be something that you needed to read today yourself. With the chaos that our society has become, many people need to hear this truth. Even with miles and miles separating family and friends, you are never alone.
I mentioned in an earlier blogpost the three things that are most important to me; faith, family & friends. I’m sure I’m not alone in that line of thinking but faith is always a touchy subject. I know what I believe, but I don’t think it’s my place to tell others what they “have to” or “should” believe. I also believe that faith is a very personal thing and many people assume or judge others incorrectly. A famous quote from the WW2 era comes to mind here, “There are no atheists in foxholes.” I think that quote can be altered a bit to read, “There are no atheists on the extremely complicated roads in life.” Again, whether we like it or not, there are words there that ring the bell of truth. I can remember “being made” to go to Sunday school and Vacation Bible School when we were young. I was like every other small town boy, there were 500 other things I’d rather do than sit in a Sunday school classroom. But as I sit writing this blog and sharing with you, a verse that I learned years ago came to mind. “Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.”John 15:13 I don’t think I’m any different than a lot of people we know. And I’m sure, beyond any doubt; that I have friends that are described in that verse that has stuck in my mind. But because of what I believe, I also want to be a friend that is described that way. I firmly believe that there comes a time in all of our lives that we have to decide, first, if there is indeed a Creator. And second, what will be my response to this belief? Again, I say, this is why it’s a very personal thing. For that very reason, I speak for myself when I say that in the deepest, darkest recess in my heart I believe that truth mentioned above; Life was never intended to be done alone. So, as I told my friend the other day, I can’t imagine walking a day in his shoes. But I intend to walk beside my friend because as a young man growing up, some of the things our parents taught us or made us do, stuck with us because they were also the right thing.
If you’re struggling through health issues, life-changes that weren’t in your original plans, or just need to be reassured with a word of encouragement, remember this truth and share it with others. Life was not intended to be done alone. Talk to a friend and have them walk this road with you. If you have a friend struggling, strap on your hiking boots and travel that road with them. Because at the end of the day, the love of family and friends does not make the world go around, but it certainly makes the wild ride called LIFE worthwhile.
That’s the view from my stand!

{Note: Because of the personal content of this post, I received permission from my friend to make this post.}