Music, Memories and Mongo!

This morning as I was doing my walking at the little county park down the road from us, a number of things came to mind. Yeah, I know, sometimes I can be a little random but for the most part I'm very comfortable blaming it on my OCD. Are you one of those people like me, where certain songs you hear creates a flood of emotions or feelings? Maybe they are reminders of people in your life, and to hear the song it warms your heart or sometimes, breaks it. Maybe there are songs that create negative feelings for you {D I V O R C E..becomes final todaaay} okay.. maybe that's not a negative. I choose to have songs that are positive and lift my spirits on my Ipod. Sometimes while I'm walking, a song will come on that I love {Journey, Chris Tomlin, Mercy Me, Toby Mac, Brad Paisley} and I will start singing along with it. Only a time or two have I failed to not look around first and as I come around a turn on the path, there's someone with a big ole grin on their face because they heard me singing to music they can't hear. {or...maybe they were laughing!}
This morning, three songs that i heard while my IPod shuffled as I walked, they gathered such raw emotions in me, creating a lump in my throat and brought tears to my eyes. I hesitate to share them; but I'm going to anyway. The first one was Brad Paisley's "She's Everything". To me, this song describes in great detail how I feel about my lovely wife of 25 years. Here are just some of the words to that song that moved me to think of her this morning:

She's a Saturday out on the town
And a church girl on Sunday
She's a cross around her neck
And a cuss word 'cause its Monday
She's a bubble bath and candles
Baby come and kiss me
She's a one glass of wine
And she's feeling kinda tipsy
She's the hand that I'm holding
When I'm on my knees and praying
She's the answer to my prayer
And she's the song that I'm playing
[Chorus]
And she's everything I ever wanted
And everything I need
I talk about her, I go on and on and on
'Cause she's everything to me

I'm a pretty lucky guy when it comes to spouses, as some of my buddies who love football would say, "I out kicked my coverage!" But I am very thankful that this woman loves me, even during those times when I don't think I deserve her love.
The second song that made me take time to reflect this morning was another Paisley song that he sings with Dolly Parton; "When I Get Where I'm Going". If you're not familiar with the song here are some of the words to this one:

(Chorus:)
Yeah when I get where I'm going,
they'll be only happy tears.
I will shed the sins and struggles,
I have carried all these years.
And I'll leave my heart wide open,
I will love and have no fear.
Yeah when I get where I'm going,
Don't cry for me down here.

I'm gonna walk with my {grand}daddy,
and he'll match me step for step,
and I'll tell him how I missed him,
every minute since he left.
Then I'll hug his neck.

This year, 8 days after my birthday, it will be 15 years since Dad passed on. Hardly a week goes by that something I say, or something I hear someone else say, or even a sound or smell, triggers a memory of Dad. {I know what you're thinking about the sound/smell thing..stop it!} I miss a lot of things about Dad, but most of all I miss the times that just the two of us had together. With 10 kids and a pile of grand kids, that wasn't always easy to do to get that alone time. But I remember many trips of going to the farm and sitting with Dad working on Jigsaw Puzzles, playing
"31" or just having some lunch. He loved to eat fresh tomatoes covered in cottage cheese and peppered nearly black. I still do that a few times a summer myself. He hated not being able to walk or go to the garage and piddle around with stuff. He also hated having to be on oxygen as well. Those things were not "who he was".
I'll always remember when it was time for me to head back to the city, I'd give Dad a hug on his neck and tell him that I loved him. We would set a date for the next time I would be out to keep him company and then he would tell me, "give Barb and Abbydabby a hug for me!" I'm pretty sure he looked forward to our visits as much as I did, maybe even more. Damn, I miss him.
The last song that struck a chord with me this morning {get it..chord?} was from one of my favorite groups the last few years, Mercy Me. As I've gotten older and realized what a calloused world this could be, my faith is something that has certainly strengthened. In the Bible we're promised that God will never give us more than we can handle or bare. Mercy Me's song, "I Can Only Imagine" was one of the songs that we chose to have playing during the visiting hours at my brother Mike's funeral after his unexpected death in November 2008. We were more than just brothers, we were best friends. At the time of his passing, I wasn't so sure about that God "promise" I mentioned earlier. I wasn't prepared for it, I didn't want it to happen, I wasn't going to accept it. It was only through the constant reminder from family, friends, songs, etc. that helped me through this time. You could say, God worked on me, through them. Anyway, here are some of the lyrics from Mercy Me's song if you're not familiar with them:

I can only imagine
What it will be like
When I walk
By your side
I can only imagine
What my eyes will see
When your face
Is before me
I can only imagine
I can only imagine
[Chorus:]
Surrounded by Your glory, what will my heart feel
Will I dance for you Jesus or in honor of you be still
Will I stand in your presence or to my knees will I fall
Will I sing hallelujah, will I be able to speak at all
I can only imagine, I can only imagine.

This song brings a peace in me that tells me, "every things going to be alright!" I miss Dad and Mike, a lot. But because of my faith in God,I believe I will see them again. This keeps me at a good balance when it seems that our country is choosing to do all the wrong things for it's people. I believe that smaller government and less government interference in our lives is better for the country as a whole. Unfortunately, we currently have leaders that don't think that way. The thing to remember is, we have a great big {Mongo} God who is the one in control. Wherever you draw your strength from, tap into it and hold on, the next few years are going to be a bumpy ride. But in the end...ahhh.....I can only imagine! That's the view from my stand!